During an interview with CNN’s Don Lemon on the red carpet of the BET Awards last night, Joe Jackson was nervously shuffling around like Amy Wino going through security at the airport. I know Joe Jackson isn’t known for being a fluffy teddy bear filled with hugs and kisses, but dude wasn’t even pretending to have the sads about his dead son. When Don said that this must be awful for the entire family, Joe said, “It has. The world lost the biggest star.” What he meant by that is….”I just lost my favorite cash cow! MOOO!”
While watching this epic display of uncomfortableness, I wondered why Joe Jackson was even there. And then the answer came to me at the 3:20 mark. Joe actually plugged his new production company and some Blu-Ray Discs he’s putting out. This is the most awkward infomercial ever!
I’m surprised Joe didn’t go all out by saying, “And Michael Jackson will be buried in NIKE sneakers, because NIKE was his favorite brand. Just do it. Yesh, he loved NIKE. Also, my fondest memories of Michael Jackson is when he would call me on Sunday nights to tell me how delicious HOT POCKETS brand paninis are. Michael used to say how tender and flaky on the outside. HOT POCKETS, Michael Jackson’s favorite microwaveable treat. Oh and Michael was also looking forward to seeing ICE AGE: DAWN OF THE DINOSAURS which hits theaters this Wednesday, July 1st……….”
Although, I will give Joe a half-clap for matching his eyebrows with his pocket square. I’ll give him that.