Last year, former pussy panderer Heidi Fleiss was living in a trailer with a bunch of parrots. It looks like Madame Heidi’s luck is turning around! Heidi has finally wrapped her salty slug lips on the right wang! Heidi has announced that she will make it legal with fellow whore dealer Dennis Hof, owner of Nevada’s Moonlite Bunny Ranch. Double the pimp! Together, there’s not a chocha they won’t be able to sell.
Heidi said, “I’m proud to say that I’m clean and sober, and I’m finally ready to make a commitment to one man – and that’s Dennis. It’s going to be my first and only wedding, so it’s going to be fabulous.” After she said that, her face fell off, because saying that many words at one time was too much pressure. It’s all good though. They used some Gorilla Glue to paste her face back on. She’ll be ready her fabulous wedding. And fabulous is right!
Heidi calls it a “wedding,” but let’s call it what it’s really going to be: a straight-up orgy. Instead of the wedding officiant (who I’m hoping will be Airforce Amy) announcing “You may now kiss the bridge,” she’s going to announce “You may now kiss the bride’s vagina.” Instead of throwing rice, the groomsmen and bridesmaids will form a circle jerk around the newlyweds and shoot loads all over them. Heidi’s something blue will be something she blew. This is going to be a wedding for the whore ages!