Another Baby Friend For Carnie Wilson

Don’t ask me why I was such a huge Wilson Phillips fangay when I was a kid in the early 90s. They were like the greatest thing to me. None of my friends understood, but their moms did. I remember singing along with one of my friends’ mothers to “Impulsive.” I even choreographed a dance number to it and showed it off to her on the driveway of her house. And I wonder why the other kids threw sand at me whenever I passed them in the playground.

Because I had such a strange fascination with Chyna, Carnie Asada and that other one, I still get excited whenever I see one of their names pop up anywhere. Carnie Asada’s name is making the rounds today, because she had a BABEH!!!!!!!

UsWeekly says that Carnie and her totally heterosexual husband Rob Bonfigilio welcomed a new baby girl into this miserable world on Friday in Los Angeles. Carnie and Rob named her Luciana Bella. They also have a 4-year-old daughter named Lola Sofia.

Luciana Bell and Lola Sofia? Did Teresa from The Real Housewives of New Jersey name them? Spoiler Alert: Teresa is totally going to name her next kid Luciana Bella Lola Sofia.

Congratulations to Carnie and her husband (HE LOVES VAGINA). After bonging and boozing tonight, I will try to perform my Ballet de Impulsive in her honor.