The African Baby Snatcher Is Officially Triumphant!

June 12, 2009 / Posted by: Michael K

After eating their breakfast of deep fried money, three judges in Malawi shuffled into court this morning and granted Vadge’s adoption of 3-year-old Mercy. As you know, they originally shut down Vadge, because she had not lived in the country for at least 18-months. She appealed and threatened to feed them to her roidy cooze monster, so they really had no choice. The mattress stuffed with money she sent them sealed the deal.

The judges also fingered Vadge’s b-hole by saying she has improved the lives of the children in Malawi with her organization. And then gallons of roid smegma came gushing out of her flooding the upper part of Manhattan. Oh yeah, Vadge isn’t even in Malawi. She’s still in NYC! The baby snatcher has no plans to travel to Africa to pick up her trophy!

According to People, Vadge is going to send a private jet to pick up Mercy. I guess FedEx wouldn’t pick up on the weekends.

That’s that. Money talks and the baby walks!

Tags: African Orphans, Buying Children, Madonna, Paris Hilton

Our commenting rules: Don't be racist or bigoted, or post comments like "Who cares?", or have multiple accounts, or repost a comment that was deleted by a mod, or post NSFW pics/videos/GIFs, or go off topic when not in an Open Post, or post paparazzi/event/red carpet pics from photo agencies due to copyright infringement issues. Also, promoting adblockers, your website, or your forum is not allowed. Breaking a rule may result in your Disqus account getting permanently or temporarily banned. New commenters must go through a period of pre-moderation. And some posts may be pre-moderated so it could take a minute for your comment to appear if it's approved. If you have a question or an issue with comments, email: michaelk@dlisted.com