Two seconds ago, it was reported that Kate Hudson and Ass-Rod were giving each other mouth jobs in NYC. I chalked it up to one of those 24-hour bugs. Well, the virus is still active. Page Six says that Kate and A-Roidy’s affair of the fart is now one week old. Surprisingly, this isn’t a record for either of them. Yeah, I think Kate was married for at least 10 days. And A-Rod was Vadge’s clit licker for at least 9.
The two celebrated their long-lasting love by spending some time together at Hotel ZaZa in Dallas after the Yankees vs. Rangers game. A source said that Brit Brit’s head double packed up her vagina and followed A-Roid down there. Yeah, “followed” was the word they used.
Kate seems like the type to fall madly in love after the first dick-to-vag session. Homegirl needs to learn that you don’t have to walk down the street hand-in-hand all lovey dovey-like with a dude just because he dicked you earlier in the day. Love. Sex. Two different animals. And sometimes the two animals don’t need to cuddle together. Actually, it’s better when they don’t. Yeah, don’t bother pouring me a bitter martini. I’m already full of it.