And It Starts!
The jolly cat lady with a heart made of rainbows and hummingbird juice is beginning to turn…. Or at least that’s what The Sun says anyway. Susan Boyle, the voice of this generation (don’t tell Kanye), flipped her brows twice in one day. TWICE! Apparently, the happy teddy bear knows the fuck word well and isn’t afraid to launch it at people. And this is the time where I really start loving Susan.
Yesterday at a hotel in North London, a police officer had to step in when Susan started going off at two strangers. Susan was not serenading them with a version of “I Dream a Dream.” No, she was telling them to fuck off! Susan apparently screamed, “How fucking dare you! You can’t fucking talk to me like that.” When the cop asked if there was a problem, Susan responded, “Of course there’s a fucking problem.” According to Susan, the haters were poking fun at her in the hotel lobby, so she dropped the “Oh gee” smile and destroyed them. Bitch got so mad that she probably popped her cherry again!
The second flip out courtesy of Susan came while she was watching Britain’s Got Talent in the lobby of a hotel. Susan’s biggest competition for the top prize is a 12-year-old boy named Shaheen. On Tuesday’s show, judge Piers Morgan basically got on the ground and worshiped Shaheen. Piers told Shaheen it was the greatest singing performance they had seen so far. And that’s when Susan screamed “fuck off” and stormed off!
A witness added, “She got up, did one of those strange wiggling dances that she does, and then stuck two fingers up at the TV. Then she marched off. We didn’t see her again.”
One source is saying that the pressure is way too much for Susan and it’s starting to get to her.
YES!!!! This is the Susan Boyle I was waiting to see! I love it when cute harmless old ladies get all cunty and shit! They all have it in them.
If Susan doesn’t win BGT, she’s going to go nuts! HOOD RAT STUFF! Susan is going to shave her head, flash her apple fritter, run over the paparazzi, elope in Vegas, dangle Shaheen over a balcony, get three DUIs, go to rehab and get knocked up by KFed. Susan is going to do all of this in one night. Hold your breath, brace yourself and put Daddy Spears on-call, because the second coming of Brit Brit is almost here. FINALLY!