When I was a kid, my abuelita used to take me to her neighborhood church. At her church, there was this statue of Jesus. This was the most broke down, janky, raggedy, low-budget statute I had ever seen in my entire life. This status made the ones you buy at the border in Tijuana look like they were made from the hands of Michelangelo himself. This statute’s nose was broken off, the coloring was way off and I’m pretty sure it was made from the melted down wax from patron saint candles bought at the local Thrifty’s.
Well, Jacko looks like a walking version of that exact statue. If my abuelita ever saw him in the street, she would put on her veil and start praying before him. Actually, I think I may light a candle and pray myself, because his face makes me feel like I need to find a high power.