The Title Is As Dumb As Her

May 18, 2009 / Posted by:

It made sense when MTV made a documentary on Our Lady of Cheetos. Yeah, it was propaganda, but it was still pretty entertaining. I mean, Velveeta grits? Need I say more? MTV’s newest documentary follows a wet piece of dog caca laying out in the hot sun. For some reason, they felt like the world wanted to know more about the half-melted dildo known as Parasite Hilton. I’d rather watch a documentary on cornstarch. Shit, I’d rather watch a documentary on the day-to-day life of her herp warts. That shit would be more riveting.

This summer MTV is airing a documentary called Paris, Not France. And I’m sure the whole thing fails on an epic scale just like the title. It’s shot in black and white, so that means it’s all serious-like and deep! And she mostly uses her bit dude voice instead of her whory baby voice, so that means we should take her seriously now.

In trailer above, the dumb whore does nothing but whine about how the world sees her as “as Barbie with a perfect life, a fantasy…whatever.” The difference is we actually respect Barbie. Bitch can fly planes and shit, but Parasite can’t even suck a dick right!

And here’s a vomit-covered gem I leave you with: “That’s not what I wanted when I was a little girl. It’s not what I planned. I always looked up to people like Princess Diana and now I can never be like that.”

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