Whose dreams have been crushed, killed and buried tonight? Find out after the jump. JUMP!!!
PRAISE JESUS! PRAISE CHEESUS! PRAISE ALLAH! PRAISE LUCITE! PRAISE BUDDHA! PRAISE XENU! PRAISE CUTLETS! PRAISE EVERYTHING!!!
We worked together and we stomped on the Lens Crafters-wearing cockroach that is Danny Gokey! We don’t have to see Danny’s smug caca-eating face at the finals next week! I’m so happy that I could slap a vag with my tongue. I’m so happy that I could kiss a clit. This is a beautiful, beautiful moment! We must all celebrate by burning our glasses. Okay, don’t do that, but at least you can look at your glasses again without thinking of that skeezy bag of butt plugs.
We did it America! We fucking did it! Get a neighbor to lick your nipple, because you did good. Well, unless you voted for Gokey. And if that’s the case….AHAHAHAHA. You lost. Viva Glamberace and Kris! I hope they make out in the finale. Or at least touch tongues.