When Kiefer Sutherland’s hos said that he head smashed a trick in defense of Brooke Shields, her people issued some statement saying they had no idea what the hell Kief was blabbing about. Well, now Brooke has slid over to Kiefer’s side and is saying he SAVED HER LIFE. Sort of. Brooke’s lawyer told Gatecrasher, “While at the after-party at SubMercer, Brooke was bumped into by Jack McCollough, and Kiefer Sutherland became concerned. Kiefer has always been a gentleman in her company.” Some source added that Jack most likely shoved Kief first and that’s what caused him to get all Jack Bauer on a ho.
Kief was charged with third-degree assault and his lawyers are trying to prove that he wasn’t in the wrong in this situation. But one of his Kief’s former co-stars isn’t so sure, because of his history with the sweet sweet nectar that is BOOZE. They said that when Kief gets a drop on his tongue, he turns into a raging alkie monster!
They said that one time they were on a 45-minute private jet ride and watched Kief devour 6 cocktails, “He was so bombed, he got violent and threatened bodily harm to another individual on the plane.” Um. I bet if you ripped open the jacket of the individual he threatened, you’d find a bomb strapped to his torso. Kief was just doing what he does!
Why can’t people just let Kief BE GREAT! Seriously. Yeah, he needs a few dozen boilermakers in his system in order to be great, but just let him!