Jon Can’t Do Anything Right

Kate Gosselin dragged her beaten down beaver hair onto Larry King last night to pimp out that book she wrote about being a big ass cunt. No, the book is about kiddes or something. But she really should write a book on how to embrace your cuntness, because she is quickly becoming my cunt idol.

Of course, Larry brought up the whole “Jon is bumping on a teacher” thing. Larry read a statement from Jon where he once again denied ever getting sexy with that woman. Kate blamed fame. But she also blamed Jon for being so stupid in the brains.

Kate told Larry, “I am not a celebrity. “I am a mom and a wife. And I feel that Jon is having difficult times realizing that, you know, you can’t go to the grocery store without people whipping out their cell phones, calling everyone they know and taking pictures of you. He is dealing very poorly with it. And I feel like these, you know, things are making him realize, oh, my gosh, I cannot go anywhere without everyone knowing. I look at life as a glass half full is my attitude. And I feel like we have learned a lot, the kids have gained a lot. We have benefited a lot. And life lessons is — you will see in our show. And this is full of life lessons. Life happens. And, you know, we all have to react to what happens to us. And I choose happiness. And I choose to survive anything.”

And you also choose to be the biggest cunt who ever cunted. Heather Mills better hop up her game.

You know, does Jon do anything right, Kate? I’m sure can’t pee pee right. He can’t wipe his ass by himself right. He can’t even cry over his slaughtered balls right. Shit, he can’t even cheat right! The only thing he does right is do everything wrong! Preach it, Kate!

VIA UsWeekly