Clorox On The Ass

May 8, 2009 / Posted by:

Sacha Baron Cohen really wanted to get into character when he filmed Bruno, but it sounds to me like there wasn’t an authentic gay on set to help him through this process. Sacha decided to bleach every single hair follicle on his body, so he could have the body of a hairless European twink power bottom. But who bleaches anymore? Well, besides my cholita cousin who thinks we all can’t see her blonde moustache glistening in the sun. Don’t tell her I told you that. I mean, every gay knows waxing the ass is the only way! Invisi-bleach is so 80s.

Anyway, either Sacha didn’t want to waltz with wax or nobody told him. Sacha found out the hard way that bleach is not the answer. The Sun says that shortly after he got bleached, his no-no turned into an ouch-ouch. A source said, “He had a bad allergic reaction to hydrogen peroxide, which is a strong bleaching agent. It was so severe around a certain part of his anatomy that he couldn’t sit down for three days. He had to make an emergency appointment with the doctors, who gave him some medication to counter the irritation. Crew members found the whole incident hilarious and it slowed down filming for a bit, but Sacha soon got over the discomfort. He has suffered no long-lasting ill effects.”

Down for 3 days?! What kind of fake gay is he? If you’re going to act the part, ACT the part. Dip that ass in some oestrogen cream, shake it off and get back out there! There have been times where my b-hole was on death’s door, but I slapped it into action, inhaled and handled my business. There’s no crying in butt sex!

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