From Men Back To Boys

April 24, 2009 / Posted by:

Little Miley Cyrus is sick of playing with grown ass men who actually have pubic hair in their private areas, so now she’s ready to shuffle back into the romper room where her ex-whatever Nick Jonas is waiting to let her play with his purity ring. That’s what a source tells Gatecrasher.

The rumor going around the cafeteria is that 16-year-old Miley wants to break up with her 20-year-old boyfriend of 8-months, Justin Gaston, so she can go around with her ex Nick Jonas. Miley hasn’t broken up with Gaston, but that hasn’t stopped her from going to first-and-a-half base with Nick. A source said, “Miley was over at the Jonas house recently, and they were smooching. Nick’s parents have this rule that when a girl is over, the door has to be open, but that didn’t stop Nick and Miley from making out.”

The source forgot something. Not only does the door have to be open, but they both have to be wearing condoms (under their clothes, thank you very much) and holding a bible in one hand.

Miley knows that she totally needs to be with Nick, like totally, but the problem is that she’s not sure how to break up with that old dude. The source went on to say, “She doesn’t know how to tell Justin that they’re over, but Nick is being very firm with her. He’s a good, stand-up kind of guy, and is making Miley tell Justin very, very soon. He’s being tough about it.”

Oh, Miley, I know it’s hard. But all you have to do is get our your cutest Post-Its and your most adorable pen. Then write this note to Gaston: “Deer JG, itz totes over. I luvz NJ again. Letz be friendz. TTYL. Have an awsome summer. I LUV JESUS! Heartz, Miley.” If you lay it on him deep like that, he’ll totally understand.

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