Battle Of The Beards

April 7, 2009 / Posted by:

Before using that title, I should’ve made sure Tommy Girl and Johnny Travolta didn’t copyright that shit. That’s the name of their annual summer picnic where Stepford Katie and Kelly Preston battle it out it for the title of Beard of the Year. Kelly always wins. She’s got that shit down.

Anygivemeabrushsoicanmakethatbeardsofter, here’s Adrien Brody and Keanu Reeves trying to out-beard each other at practice for the Celebrity Gran Prix in Long Beach, CA.

So who has the beardiest beard here? Keanu Reeves’ beard looks a little too much like Vadge’s sascrotch, so my gorgeous Afghan Hound Adrien Brody gets this one. Adrien looks like he prunes his pubic face bush regularly, because it doesn’t climb to his cheeks.

I don’t mind my nalgas getting gently exfoliated during a salad tossing, but Keanu’s beard would scrape off my ass skin and that’s not pleasant.

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