Blohan Gets Locked Out

So it looks like Blohan is off the snatch which means every peen in Hollywood should be crawling up in between its owner’s ass cheeks to keep safe. Blohan might be back on the prowl after SamRo quit her crazy ass for good. SamRo really means it this time you guys, because she even changed the locks on her front door and everything!!!! Yeah, this must be SamRo’s first time dealing with a lunatic with nothing else better to do than find ways to break in. Changing the locks won’t do shit!! Blohan will squeeze her skanky bony ass through the air conditioning ducts if she really wants in.

Obviously, she didn’t, because she took her ass to the Chateau Marmont, where I’m pretty sure you can order the bad shit through room service. Blo was photographed there yesterday with The Curious Case of Ali Lohan and White Oprah. Oh, of course White Oprah was there. Blohan had a case of the lezzie sads and nothing makes her feel better like a bowl of her mom’s home-cooked Xanax soup. The paparazzi also caught Blo giving me a case of deja vu while riding up to her hotel early this morning.

At this point, some whore just needs to leave a trail of coke from the Chateau Marmont to Casa de Cheeto, so Daddy Spears can sort her the fuck out with his cheese grits. Because if some shit doesn’t happen, Blohan is going to go “shave your head” crazy. Although, the bitch kind of needs to shave her head since that weave is looking like something Kim Zolciak’s wig queefed out.