Marilyn Manson Wants Dita Von Teese Back

March 19, 2009 / Posted by:

The goth tequila worm nobody wants to swallow has been calling the original Dita Von Teese on the phone to try and get her baby powder-covered ass on his face again. Marilyn must have gotten tired from trying to clone her a million times, so he just figured he should go back to the first.

However, Dita is not interested, because she’s too busy putting some frequent-flier miles on her vag. Dita said, He’s been in touch a little. The apologies come, and he was like, ‘I made a big mistake’. And I’m like, ‘Yeah, yeah, I know. Go ahead and say what you need to say to feel better and to sleep at night.’ Right now I’ve got three (men). They’re all in different parts of the world… That’s my biggest sin – juggling men.

Marilyn, stick your limp lechees into a tub of Crisco and forget about Dita, because she doesn’t want it. She had the dick, it was sour, the after-taste is finally gone and now she’s moving the fuck on.

And I really must stand up and perform the dick-slappy dance in Dita’s honor. This bitch is doing it right. She’s taking that pussy international! Eff Marilyn and fuck an Asian, French, Middle Eastern, African, Australian, English, Swedish, South American, Russian and Antarctican dude instead.

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