Chris Brown Quits The Kid’s Choice Awards Due To “The Incident”

March 11, 2009 / Posted by:

Chris Brown’s pr whores must have busted him in the head finally, because dude got a clue and pulled himself off the list of nominees at the Nickelodeon Kids’ Choice Awards. Chris was nominated for two awards which made a mob of parents scream hells naw. Bobby Brown will take his place instead. Nooooo!

Chris’ spokeswhore issued this little statement today:

“Chris very much appreciates the support of his fans and the honor they have paid him in the way of nominations for Favorite Male Singer and Favorite Song.

Unfortunately, the controversy surrounding the incident last month has shifted the focus from the music to whether he should be allowed to be among those nominated.

While Chris would like to speak to his fans directly about this and other issues, pending legal proceedings preclude his doing so at this time. Once the matter before him has been resolved, he intends to do so.”

“The incident?” That’s what my family calls the time I farted in the bath tub and failed in a big way. My mom walked in to what looked like me sitting in a bowl of soggy Cocoa Krispies. I was 7. Okay, it was last week.

And now you can cancel your plans to break into the awards show to replace the slime with toxic acid milked from Parasite Hilton’s snatch.

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