Where In The Universe Is Jesus?

February 23, 2009 / Posted by:

Madonna was without child at last night’s Vanity Fair Oscar party. It was rumored that Vadge would use the party as her official coming out with Jesus. That didn’t happen. Vadge came solo.

Maybe they were canoodling earlier and Jesus forgot the safe word, so he blacked out. Seriously, if Vadge hugged me, I think every bone in my body would quit that bitch. That roid-sponsored bicep could poke a damn head off. Dudes have to wrap their dicks in armor when she gives them a handjob.

I think that when Jesus blacked out, Vadge took some skin from his baby ass and pasted it over her face. The old hag’s mug looks as smooth as Baby Jesus’ nalgas. And for the sake of humanity and working eyeballs, I hope she stayed away from floor lights in that dress.

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