Wonder Wig!

February 20, 2009 / Posted by:

Here’s some amazing news for Kim Zolciak, Brit Brit, Ty Ty Banks, Little Richard and every other be-wigged celebwhore. Wigs save lives! It’s a fact! BeWEAVE it! 20-year-old Briana Bond of Kansas City, MO is proof of this shit.

On Wednesday night, Briana was in a convenience store parking lot, being sexy hot, when a dude drove up and said her ex-boyfriend still loved her. Briana wasn’t hearing that shit and she replied, “Well I don’t love him.” When Briana looked back at the car, her crazy ex-boyfriend was in the passenger seat and he started shooting at her ass! And by her “ass,” I mean her prized wig! Briana felt one bullet hit her head. That motherfucker tried to kill her ass!

Briana hit the gas and busted out of that bitch! She drove into another parking lot and called the police. She checked her head and felt a little blood, but realized the bullet didn’t go through, because her fucking wig and its cap stopped it! Briana said, “I invested a lot of money into this wig, and it saved my life. I’ve got an angel.” Those are beautiful words. Truly. That quote should be printed on the tag of every wig, right under 100% polyester and Made in China.

Kim, Brit Brit and Little Richard better start praying to the wig angels every night to always be with them.

(Thanks Samara)

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