M.I.A.’s Baby Has Landed

This past Sunday, M.I.A.’s knocked up and polka-dotted ass was bouncing around the Grammy stage making almost every bitch nervous. Seriously, I thought bitch’s coochie was going to explode and a baby was going to come sliding out on an amniotic waterfall. Unfortunately, that didn’t happen, because it would’ve made the Grammys worth watching. But M.I.A.’s baby has finally decided to grace us with its presence. M.I.A. and her boyfriend, Benjamin Brewer, brought a boy boy into this cruel, cruel world on Wednesday in Los Angeles. This is her first kid.

M.I.A. confirmed the news on her MySpace blog:

HAPPY VALENTINES!

SUNDAY NITE I CA M E HOME FROM THE GRAMMY’S STILL IN THE MOOD TO PARTY , I COUDA EASILY GONE OUT BUT I WENT HOME INSEAD , LUCKY I DID!! COZ MY EARLY STAGE LABOUR KICKED IN AROUND 2 AM .

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vfndz8pW9WY

MY BABY WAS BORN WEDNESDAY , HE IS HEALTHY , FINE , BEAUTIFUL AND THE MOST AMZING THING EVER ON THIS PLANET, OF COURSE IM HIS MUM!!!

ME AND BABY ARE PUTTING OUR TOUR DATES FOR 2010 TOGETHER
AND MAKING MIX TAPES
AND FIGURING OUT A WAY TO BREAK OUT OF THE HOSPITAL !

HOPEFULLY THE WORLD IS BEEN TICKING ALONG AND I AINT MISSED MUCH!

C U SOON ,

AND MY BABY BOY SAYZ HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kanye West must be M.I.A.’s official transcriber. Actually, this mess looks like it was written by someone who was recently a fetus, so her new baby boy must have busted this out. Homeboy was still dizzy from all that bouncing around so he didn’t even want to deal with upper case and lower case.

And I cannot wait to see what she named this boy. M.I.A. is from planet Erykah Badu, so I hope this shit will make my eyes roll into the back of my head. I’m thinking she should name him Bamboo Banga Jimmy.