Yesterday, I posted a video of Salma Hayek using her chichis of wonder to save a starving baby in Sierra Leone. I joked that the baby is now a mega genius who can solve the world’s most impossible problems. Well, that was no joke. Salma’s miracle chichis really do turn babies into little prodigies.
During an interview with that troll Rachael Ray and Rachael’s buff gymnast titties, Salma said her 16-month-old daughter Valentina can already speak three languages. She speaks English, French and Spanish. Damn and fuck! I can’t even get English right and that baby has got me beat. Eff night classes at Sylvan Learning Center. I need to get schooled by Valentina. Or maybe I just need to nuzzle on Salma’s chichis and they will give me all the answers.
Salma also went on to say that her daughter sees ghosts! “Last night she woke up and her eyes were open. And she’s looking at one specific point and she’s going, ‘No no no no, au revoir,’ which means goodbye in French … And she’s looking at someone, but there’s no one there. was so scared, and I’m like, ‘Yes, au revoir, whoever you are, get out!’ And then she started saying it in English: ‘Bye bye, bye bye!’ I guess she was trying in different languages to see what nationality this ghost was to go away. It was terrifying!”
Homegirl was showing off her premium language skills. And it was just Einstein’s spirit visiting her genius ass. Valentina tutors him at night.