It Was Over A Text Message

The latest chapter in the Brown/Riri beat down saga of 2009 claims that the fight between the two was over a text message he got from some ho while he was driving. A police source tells TMZ that RiRi read a text from some trick Chris was planning on doing sexy times with later. They also fought about an unnamed rapper, but that’s not how the fight started. And Chris’ pussy call is not the rapper. I’ve also read on several sites that they were fighting about RiRi giving Chris the herp which she got from a rapper.

As for the identity of Chris’ whore, OK! says that a few days before he basically punched his career goodbye, he was seen getting flirty with the STD motel known as Wonky McValtrex. If Chris beat RiRi over a text he got from Wonky, that bitch deserves eleventy life sentences and a ten-hour dick slapping from Tommy Lee. Chris is the one who deserved a beat down for flirting with that skeezer.

Annnnnnnnnd there’s more. E! (everyone’s getting in on the fun) says a source told them that Chris theatened to kill RiRi after she threw the car keys out of the window during the beat down. This put the rage of James Brown into Chris’ body and he allegedly choked her until she passed the fuck out. That’s when he quit that bitch and took off running.

There’s more details on her injuries. RiRi’s right eye was swollen up like one of Wonky’s pussy lips, so she couldn’t open it.

Okay, who else needs to dance with a crack pipe after reading that shit? I felt like Chris just broke dishes over my head. Every time I click on other websites, there’s ten more damn rumors. I feel like we need pie charts, graphs, etc…. When I read one story, it debunks the other. I don’t like doing math! Let’s share a bottle of something that kills brain cells in order to deal with the madness.