2009 is all about dumb whores getting dropped from big ad campaigns. That’s just what happened to Chris Brown. Well, technically, he got suspended. A spokeswhore for Wrigley’s said that because he allegedly broke fits on RiRi, they aren’t going to show his Doublemint commercial or any other kind of marketing until the situation is worked out. Somewhere in the world, Jayne and Joan Boyd are waiting for their rotary phones to ring.
You know, companies need to start hiring bitches they know will behave like fine ladies for the rest of their lives. That’s why Spaghetti Cat and Stains should be getting more high-profile campaigns. They are both pure creatures. Actually, I shouldn’t say that. They both really love food in a weird way, so there might be a “food play” tape starring them floating around out there. I wouldn’t be surprised.