You might want to push your dropped jaw off of your keyboard so you can write, “FUCK ME THRICE! I”M SHOCKED” about the news that Jonathan Knight of New Kids on the Block loves ze juicy cock in his mouth. I know, this bombshell shook me so hard that I think it turned me straight. But a quick glance at JcPenney’s men’s panty section will turn me gay again.
The news that everyone in the world and their glory hole partner knew about comes courtesy of one of Jonathan’s ex-lovahs. Kyle Wilker sold his story and a couple of pictures to The National Enquirer (via Boy Culture). Kyle told the Enquirer, “We had a wonderful relationship. I was in love with him and I believe he was in love with me.” Selling out an ex to the entire world is what true love is all about. I wonder why it didn’t work? Must have been Jonathan’s fault, because Kyle sounds like a perfect fucking peach. May cocks never get hard in his mouth again for pulling this shit!
Kyle said Jonathan realized he wanted dudes after dating Tiffany. Tiffany just didn’t have the right stuff….in her pants (GONG!). Well, listening to “Could’ve Been” does make your a-hole twitter a bit and fart glitter. So that’s understandable.
So…now that we’ve gotten that out of the way. Who’s next? My strong dollars are on Bryan from Color Me Badd. Those eyebrows cannot tell a lie.