This Could Be Good

February 5, 2009 / Posted by:

I’ve been waiting for the perfect theatrical experience to drop acid too and now Universal has delivered! Variety says they have hired the dude who wrote Tropic Thunder to work on the screenplay for Candy Land: The Movie. This shit is a raver’s wet dream come to life. We should all sell Ecstasy in a booths outside the theater. Early retirement!

True story. When I was a young gay, I actually wrote a short story based on Candy Land. Okay, it was really based around Queen Frostine only. The other characters were hardly in it. I mean, Queen Frostine is the best bitch in that game and I really wanted to be her. I ran around the house in a dress I made out of a shower curtain and plastic wrap thinking I was the damn frosty Queen of Candy Land.

They better not even think of fucking this up by casting Nicole Kidman. She’s the easy choice since the ho is made out of ice already. It’s 2009, so methinks they should rename her Queen Lucite and you know the rest…..

And Zac Efron is a fucking shoo-in for Princess Lolly. The role is his to lose.

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