Who The Fuck Is Next?

January 28, 2009 / Posted by: Michael K

The last time we left ScarJo’s singing career, she had just finished butchering a bunch of Tom Waits songs. Sad. I hope she gave them a good titty jiggle before they met their demise. Well, ScarJo’s next victim is Jeff Buckley. ScarJo covered Jeff Buckley’s “Last Goodbye” for that I NEED A MAN: The Jennifer Aniston Story movie. The only thing this bitch ScarJo should cover is her fucking mouth.

Okay, ScarJo’s version doesn’t make me want to fuck my ears with skewers, but it’s just not worthy. The bitch has the emotional depth of a crotch crouton. This shit would make sense if it was packaged with a bottle of Nytol, a glass of lukewarm milk and one of those precious body hugging pillows. She sounds like a mouth breather who just overdosed on Tylenol PM. To sleep!

And who is ScarJo the song-butcher going to go after next? If she even tries to cover the legendary musical genius of my life known as Debbie Deb, then you better stay indoors because an out-for-blood homo will be on the loose.

VIA ONTD

Tags: I Don't Like Jokes, Scarlett Johansson

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