Howie Mandel is over in Toronto shooting his new shit show Howie Do It (cleeeever) and had to be hospitalized for a little heart condition. His spokesbitch shouted from the highest point that he did not have a heart attack. Howie’s heart did not attack! Got it? Okay, but his rep went on to say that doctors asked him to stay overnight so they could monitor his irregular heartbeat. If all goes his way, Howie will be out of the hospital today and back to work.
Real talk. Someone probably grabbed his hand and shook it. Seriously. When Deal or No Deal first started, all these whores kept telling me to closely watch Howie, because he never shakes anyone’s hand. I didn’t know Howie had OCD and a phobia of germs. That’s why he always pound fists (sexy) with contestants.
That would suck if you were a major germaphobe. How would you hold a stranger’s peen? How would you even lick a stranger’s peen? I guess you would be doing a lot of fisting since that kind of shit is okay.
Howie can never experience giving a stranger a hand job behind the park bushes just after midnight. Everyone should experience that just once. That breaks my boner in two. SAD!
And I wonder how Howie is dealing with being in the hospital. The germs are alive everywhere in the hospital! Those evil germs are jumping into his palm and having a dirty dirty party. Naw. Howie probably requested a full body condom. Naked Gun-style.