Naomi Better Not Eff This Up

Hopefully that blue noodle Naomi Campbell is carrying will be used for pleasure and not pain on her billionaire boyfriend. I don’t know how that bitch caught herself a hot Russian billionaire, but she better do whatever it takes to keep his ass. The only thing better than a hot billionaire is a Russian one. Every gift they give you is probably covered in diamonds and gold. Instead of giving you a credit card to go shopping with, they give you solid gold bars. We all need a hot Russian billionaire in our lives. Naomi’s Russian billionaire probably cums money and vodka. He is absolutely perfect.

Naomi better drug and marry this one before it’s too damn late! And if she ever thinks of throwing a Blackberry at him, she better beat herself with it instead. Wait. Maybe he’s into getting beat down by Naomi. That would make sense. If that’s the case, Naomi must have somehow done right by the gods, because she might be the luckiest bitch alive.

Here’s Naomi and her hot piece of pure gold in the Maldives with Stefano Gabbano and his toy. If they had beaches in West Hollywood, this is what that shit would look like. Speedos, long tubes and Naomi Campbell!