Dear James Cialella, It’s Not That Serious!

December 27, 2008 / Posted by:

I will admit that when I’m watching a movie in a theater and some dumb ass whore is yapping away like they are sitting in their damn living room, I think to myself, “Damn. I want to turn this straw into a shank and stab this bitch in the mouth!” Well, some dude in Philadelphia had even worse thoughts and carried that shit out!

29-year-old James Joseph Cialella was arrested after he shot a dude in the damn arm for running his mouth during a showing of The Curious Case of Benjamin Button in Philadelphia on Christmas Day. I think James Joseph Cialella just became an honorary Brangaloonie for busting a bitch during Brad’s movie!

Police say that James asked a family sitting in front of him to shut their damn mouths during the movie. They didn’t stop, so he threw popcorn at their asses. When that didn’t shut their mouth holes, James got up and approached the family. James had words with the father, the argument got physical and that’s when he pulled out a gat and shot the man in his arm. After James put a bullet in the father’s arm, he sat back down and continued to watch the movie like nothing happened. The victim was taken to the hospital and James was arrested. He was charged with with attempted murder, aggravated assault and weapons violations.

DAMN! Hood rat stuff to the extreme. Over Benjamin Button? I mean, what the fuck? Maybe James has a strange fetish for Brad Pitt in old face. I could see beating a ho over Showgirls or Marley & Me (BURN!!!), but Benjamin Button?! I swear, some people should not be allowed to leave the comfort of their own padded room. James shouldn’t even be allowed to carry a watergun anymore. Talk about over-fucking-reacting.

This also serves as a warning to me, because I’m one of those bitches who tells whores to shut their fat lips during movies. I’ve been known to throw in a “Eat your tongue, cunt!” or “Shut the fuck up” to bitches who are ruining my theater going experience. The next time I do that shit, I could get shot in the arm! That must suck, laying there with a bleeding arm, thinking that the last thing you’ll ever see is Brad Pitt with pepaw face. Sad!

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