Lance Armstrong Made A Baby

Who says you need two nuts to make a baby? Lance Armstrong is going to be a daddy for the fourth time. He told People that his girlfriend Anna Hansen is pregnant with their baby due in June. Lance put together this little statement and released it to the world: “We are very much looking forward to what 2009 brings on many fronts. We appreciate respecting our privacy, as we are both eager to celebrate the holidays as a family.”

As you know, Lance is only operating with one ball friend due to testicular cancer, but apparently this baby was made the natural-way. The L.A. Times says this is rare.

Lance’s other three kids were conceived through in vitro with frozen sperm pops Lance made before he started chemotherapy.

First of all, Jakey Poo is not smiling at this news. He wanted to be Lance’s next baby mama. I bet he even has a crop-shirt that says “Lance Armstrong’s Next Baby Mama.” Second of all, if I was Lance, I’d have Maury on standby at the birth of his baby. Something in the jizz ain’t clean about this shit. Lance may think he has the magic nut, but Anna’s vagina could have been dancing with some other spermies.