Kellie Pickler Needs A Chola Makeover

December 16, 2008 / Posted by:

Kellie Pickler’s bare ass face is begging for a gorgeous chola makeover! Kellie reminds me of this white girl in junior high school who hung out with all my cholita friends. Her name was Rebecca, but she made everyone call her ass Ricca (pronounced Ree-ca). She was stunning. She had the Sharpie eyebrows, black lip liner, slick backed hair, oversized Dickies, wife beater, the whole thing… Ricca even painted a tear under her eye to look extra hardcore.

She showed us a scar and said she got it from a knife fight. Ha. We later found out it was just an appendix scar. Dumb bitch! Anyway, Kellie reminds me of her ass. Without make-up, Kellie has major period face, but with just a few Sharpie lines over her eyes and lips, she can be a gorgeous chola beauty!

Below is a preliminary sketch of the chola beauty Kellie can become. Don’t be jealous of these Photoshop skills. She’s already a million times more glamorous!

Here’s Kellie leaving for Iraq from DC today. Kellie probably had a really deep conversation with Obama. Nobody tell her that the Obama she bonded with is made out of cardboard.

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