How Dare They!!

December 16, 2008 / Posted by:

What the hell kind of GD celebrities do Naomi Watts and Liev Schreiber think they are? They should just retire and go live in the jungle or some shit. They actually gave their child a normal name! The horror. It’s just as I expected, but I thought that they might surprise us or something. That was foolish of me, because they are both made out of boiled broccoli.

Naomi popped out their second son this weekend and they gave him the name: Samuel Kai Schreiber. They actually thought about their son’s future dealings with possible school yard bullies. Imagine that! Naomi and Liev need to check the toilet the next time they go #2, because I bet there would be caca bits floating in there instead of fool’s gold. This would confirm that they aren’t celebwhores, but just normal people like us. Yes, normal people exist in the celebworld. Look at Phoebe Price!

Although, maybe they aren’t as normal as we think. Maybe they meant to name him Samwell after their love for the song What What (In the Butt), but spelled the name wrong on the birth certificate. If I lose my mind and decide to have a baby friend, I’m totally going to name it Samwell!

Here’s totally average person Liev with his other son Alexander Pete (Egaaad! Another normal name!) in NYC last night.

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