Our Lady Of Cheetos Is On Top!

December 10, 2008 / Posted by:

There’s going to be a big possum cookout in the Spears family backyard today because Brit Brit has the #1 album in the country! Daddy Spears is probably dancing around in his wife beater and singing, “Slap me wif a ho’nee beavah! Mah li’l Cheeto is numbah one!

Circus sold a little over 500,000 copies in its first week. This gives Brit Brit the second-biggest debut by a chick this year. Taylor Swift has the highest-selling debut. Circus is also on track to become the seventh-biggest debut of 2008.

Brit’s tour is also selling out. They’ve added new dates in London, Los Angeles, New Jersey, Chicago and Toronto.

I tried to buy tickets for this shit, but I’m not taking over $100 from my booze fund to stand the entire time. Now, I like to be up close and personal, but most of the floor area is standing only. I don’t know how to stand that long. Sorry. My legs are on a timer. They give out after 30-minutes.

During Brit’s possum bbq today, she better give a speech and thank Daddy Spears, the good people at Forest Laboratories and whoever invented lip-synching and auto-tune.

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