The Best Actress Oscar Race Is Over!

Here we have the most important 45 seconds in cinematic history. It’s Phoebe Price’s pivotal role in the feature film “Get Smart,” which really should have been called “Get Cutlets” in her honor. Watch PP instantly go from international supermodel to international screen star in a matter of seconds. Don’t blink or make any sudden movements, because you might miss it. I’m serious. Stay still.

No, she doesn’t have any lines, but she speaks with her cutlets! The raw emotion is pouring out of her like gravy. I mean, can Meryl Streep pretend to window shop the same way Chicken Cutlets can? I think not. A silver screen star is born.

Below is soon-to-be Oscar winner Chicken Cutlets trying not to be noticed at the very private The Ivy restaurant yesterday. The usually humble PP was kind enough to show off her editorial spread in Vogue Magazine. Okay, it was really some tabloid, but what’s the difference, really? Not much, so says Jennifer Aniston! Notice how PP tags all the pages she’s in. She’s so organized! PP must be prepared for the thousands of fans who attack her on the street to see let see her latest work.

I also threw in some screen shots of PP’s powerful performance. My faith in American cinema has been restored.