God Is Going To Be A Pepaw Again

December 4, 2008 / Posted by:

The daughter of God and half-sister of Jesus, Celestia (aka Anne Heche), is knocked up with James Tupper’s baby. It’s their first child together. The crazy fauxmosexual already has a 6-year-old son named Homer with her ex-husband, Coley Laffoon.

Anne and James met on the set of Men in Trees when they were both still married. Sluts! Their spokesbitch issued this extremely wordy statement to People: “They are really thrilled.”

Anne better name her kid God Jr. or Lil’ Celestia. She won’t, though. Since the kid will be Homer’s sibling, she’ll probably name it something predictable like Marge or Illiad.

P.S. – Anne got that dress at the Flavor of Love stoop sale. She forgot to read the label that clearly states the dress should only be worn by bitch’s with plastic titty sacks.

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