I’d Still Hit It

November 17, 2008 / Posted by:

This is apparently Johnny Depp as the Mad Hatter in Tim Burton’s “Alice in Wonderland.”

It’s like Tim Burton took Edward Scissorhands, Willy Wonka, Sweeney Todd, Ichabod Crane, threw them all into a Cuisinart, added a sprinkle of Ziggy Stardust, a zest of Helena Bonham Carter and pressed pulse.

Tim Burton must have stock in Johnson & Johnson, because the bitches in his movies are always covered in Baby Powder. I pray that the Crackie of Camden never stumbles onto the London set of this movie, because she will try to cut up and snort everyone!

You know, this is exactly how I expected Johnny as Burton’s Mad Hatter to look. I was hoping Tim Burton would do something different and make Johnny do the whole movie completely naked. Well, naked except for a floppy top hat, of course. Now that’s what I call art!

And yes, I’d still hit it. If I blink my eyes really fast, Johnny kind of looks like Carrot Top in Geisha make-up and that’s always been a fantasy of mine.

VIA Coming Soon

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