“Vadge Is Watching Me!!!!”

October 21, 2008 / Posted by:

Guy Ritchie is sleeping with one eye open because he thinks Vadge has sent her “goons” to spy on him after their official break-up. How very “Dick Tracy” of her.

Guy has his man panties in a bunch after certain details of a private divorce “war summit” were leaked to Vadge. I’m sorry for putting the words “leak” and “Vadge” in the same sentence. The visuals alone…

The Sun
reports that Guy accused Vadge of acting like the KGB and screamed at her, “This is a divorce, not the Cold War.” After that, Vadge the Hulk slapped him with one of her buff labia lips and Guy went out cold. That will teach him to scream at her.

A friend said, “Any hopes Guy had of their divorce being private and dignified are out the window. The allegations he was a cruel and neglectful husband have torn him apart so much that he invited his father and sister to the house on the weekend for dinner. They discussed the divorce and how Guy could stand his ground against Madonna and her PR machine.”

Guy somehow found out that Vadge and her goons knew about the dinner and had been keeping track of him for a few days. “When Guy found out he lost the plot. He said, ‘How can you set fire to our whole world? Why go to such lengths to destroy me?’ But Guy knows it would be unusual if Madonna wasn’t monitoring his every move. She’s a control freak and there’s so much at stake.”

If he thinks Vadge sending her goons to spy on him is bad, wait until he shits out the tracking device she secretly shoved up his ass while fucking him with her roided-up mega clitty.

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