Pink is out promoting an album so now is a good time as any to talk about her problems with ze booze. Pink said she checked into a “health center” this past summer because she started binge drinking and was afraid she developed a nasty little habit.
She says, “A few months ago, I went to see a specialist because I thought I was an alcoholic. I have a problem with my vices. I’ve kicked the drugs, but every now and then I have to go out and get completely wasted on alcohol. For me it’s about losing control. I’m such a control freak it’s very hard for me to lose my inhibitions without something chemical inside me. How do you really have fun if there isn’t a little drink in you? I don’t actually know.”
The answer to Pink’s question is: you don’t. I’m joking! The real answer to her question is: you smoke crack instead. I’m full of jokes today! The real REAL answer to her question is: you let a stranger finger bang you…..with a condom on his finger of course!
Pink went on to say, “I checked into Canyon Ranch in Tucson, Arizona, in the summer and I went to see a therapist, telling him I was an alcoholic. He asked me when I’d had my last drink and I couldn’t remember – it had been a few weeks previously. I then read the AA (Alcoholics Anonymous) manual cover to cover and we talked. I realized I wasn’t an alcoholic, just someone who likes to get drunk every now and again. I’m trying to work out if that’s a bad thing.”
Pink, the next time you think you have a problem with booze, drink more booze. After you wake up from blacking out, you would have forgotten all about this supposed “booze problem.” See how that works?
Here’s a few pictures of Pink looking like a dusty tampon at the ARIA Awards in Sydney yesterday.