Jamie Lynn Got Knocked Up Again?!
I guess the rubber band around Casey’s plastic baggie condom wasn’t tight enough, because The National Enquirer claims Jamie Lynn Spears has done got knocked up again! Hit me baby one more time! A source said that 17-year-old Jamie Lynn is about eight weeks pregnant. She popped out Maddie Briann almost four months ago.
The source went on to say that friends are begging Jamie Lynn to get an abortion. “They’ve reminded Jamie Lynn how much trouble she had adjusting to motherhood with Maddie, and pointed out that having a second baby now would only be a recipe for disaster.” No, it would be a recipe for hillbilly comedy!
Jamie Lynn was “shocked” to learn she got knocked up because she believed “she couldn’t get pregnant while she was breast-feeding.” Jamie Lynn was expecting to get her period in September, but when Aunt Flo didn’t come knocking, she ran out, bought a pregnancy test and it came back positive. Oh and by “Aunt Flo” I mean her period blood. Jamie Lynn probably has an Aunt Flo, so I’m just clearing that up.
SHOCKED to learn?! Getting knocked up again is the least of her problems. She really should be worried about the fact that her brains are made of dried chitterlings. Stupid ass Jamie Lynn. Somebody needs to tell her that when the snake goes into the cave without protection and barfs in it, there’s a chance that a baby flower might grow inside of you. Don’t put it that way when you tell her, because she’ll think you’re talking about a real snake. The dumb bitch!
The source said that Jamie Lynn and Lynne Spears tried to keep the news secret before they figured out what to do. Translation: Lynn Spears is trying to figure out how she can make the most money off of this shit!
Congratulations, Jamie Lynn! You actually found a way to out-trash Brit Brit! Give yourself an extra helping of pork rind pie for that!