Here Comes Sienna Miller!

Is Sienna Miller talking to her purse again? That silly slut! Sienna, your PUSS is the one with all the answers, not your purse! I swear! She’s been slapped in the head with a dangerous dong way too many times.

So! My favorite happy homewrecker isn’t so happy. Sienna is depressed because the press in England has labeled her a shameless whore. The final straw came when some hater of loose women spray-painted the word “SLUT” on her house. I take that as a compliment, but I guess Sienna didn’t appreciate it.

Sienna has decided to pack up her floppy vag lips and flee London for Los Angeles where she plans to shack up with Balthazar Getty. Sienna’s step-mommy said: “It’s disgusting that she can not live in her own country. Now she’s going to have to leave the country to get on with life. She can’t live here now. Why is it that if a man leaves his wife the new woman gets all the shit? That doesn’t happen the other way round.”

Um….bitches are just as rude as here. Sienna needs to embrace it. When someone calls her a “dumb skank slut,” she should say “thank you.” That’s what I do! I’d rather be a slut who sucks dicks in their sleep than a frigid bitch who can’t even squeeze out a shit.

And something tells me the sale of male chastity belts will go waaaaaay up in Los Angeles once Sienna arrives.