I am so fucking giddy because I get to post about Chico’s! “A Chico’s kind of day” is one of my favorite phrases ever! Every now and again when someone asks me how I’m doing, I’ll sigh, close my eyes and softly say, “I’m having a Chico’s kind of day.” I have no idea what that means, but it’s comforting. I think it means that you’re having hot flashes and craving fabrics that look like they were inspired by wallpaper remnants from the clearance bin. Or it just means that you’re trying to hide gut over bagina.
Before leaving for Beijing, Debbie Phelps headed on down to Chico’s and bought her entire Olympics wardrobe. She told The Pittsburgh Gazette, “I knew I was going to need to be prepared for a variety of events, activities and climates, so I picked key pieces that I could mix and match, dress up and dress down.” The store noticed that Debbie wore their old lady shit to almost every Olympic event so they posted a picture of Debbie on their website alongside all the crap she wore.
The store is now talking to Debbie’s “management” about working with her. A spokesbitch for Chico’s said, “We think she looks amazing. We think she really resonates with women everywhere.” Wait. Hold up. Rewind. Debbie has management?! And it starts….. Expect a line of Debbie Phelps boxed wine, Debbie Phelps menopausal pads and Debbie Phelps thongs. I can’t wait.
So, let me ask you something. What kind of day are you having? If you don’t say, “A Chico’s kind of day,” then you better turn around and go take a shit.