Mayer Time!

August 22, 2008 / Posted by:

Is it just me or is John Mayer sort of wearing Hammer pants? I see just a hint of “U Can’t Touch It” and I don’t like it one bit. I don’t even want to see a teensy bit of Hammer pants flavor. Let’s not go there.

Stepford Katie’s pegged jeans, I can handle. But 80s surfer pants of any kind should be kept in a box in your garage with the word “memories” scribbled on it. You can only take them out to dance to songs from the period and that’s it. Do not wear them outside of the house. Not even the gym. Nowhere.

I mean, what’s fucking next? Ripped up denim coochie cutters over spandex bicycle shorts? I don’t think my ass can handle that anymore. And yes, I used to rock that shit in elementary school. I thought I was the sexy shit. No wonder my nickname was Fruity Pebbles.

Here’s more of weepy Mayer with his brother outside of Nobu in NYC last night.

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