Oprah Has It Hard

Too busy to live? Well, Oprah is too busy to pose for the covers of her own magazine. The Mighty O has been on every cover since 2000 and she’s sick of that shit! That’s what Page Six claims anyway.

A source told them, “Oprah has told the editors at O magazine she’s tired of being on the cover every month. It’s a pain. It takes a lot of time and energy and she’s sick of it. She’s given them six months to figure out what to do without her.”

Hmm…I say they should go to the next letter in the alphabet and change the name of the magazine to P. That way international supermodel Phoebe Price can be on the cover each week. I’m joking! Don’t throw salmonella-laced cutlets at me!

A rep for the magazine said this shit is a bold-faced lie and that Oprah will continue to pose for covers.

How hard could it be to get your picture taken once or twice a month? If it’s really such a hassle, Oprah should get herself cloned. Or she can just pay for Gayle King to have plastic surgery to look just like her. I’m sure Gayle would queef at the chance to be Oprah’s twin.

And since I mentioned Chicken Cutlets in this post, it would be illegal for me not to include some stunning photos of her. Here she is posing with her dog and a magazine while out in Beverly Hills yesterday. Seriously, that dog can’t wait to fucking feast on her cutlets while she sleeps. Look at him sniffing and shit.