Why Did They Cover Up His Hot Body?!

August 19, 2008 / Posted by:

The king of all humans, Michael Phelps, shot this Sports Illustrated cover on Sunday night in China. The issue will already be on newsstands tomorrow. Those bitches are quick!

This is what I don’t understand. Why would they cover up his hot body?! That shit is his real gold medal! I mean, they really should have just wrapped the gold medals around the top of his head instead. Hide the flaws and show us what we really want to see! On second thought, they should have just hung the gold medals from his golden peen. And I’m not joking. His peen is probably made of gold.

Here’s the inspiration for Phelps’ SI cover. Mark Spitz took this iconic image back in 1972. Spitz’s version wins. Sorry. It’s all about the pornstache.

VIA Cover Awards

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