Everybody! Raise a bottle of poppers to celebrate Tommy Girl’s victory at the box office! Okay, homegirl really isn’t the star of “Tropic Thunder,” but that doesn’t matter! He still has a hit movie! You know he’s celebrating by treating himself to a little ride on L. Ron Hubbard’s frozen dick. He rides it until he sees stars….and planets….and his alien people.
“Tropic Thunder” kicked “The Dark Knight” off of the top perch where it’s been sitting for the past four weeks. Even though TDK fell to the #2 spot with $16.8 million for the weekend, it has become the second highest-grossing movie in the history of forever. With a total gross of $471 million, TDK ranks second behind “Titanic” which has $601 million in its wallet. Don’t let go, Jack! Batman is coming for you.
Here’s how the weekend box office looked:
1. Tropic Thunder – $26 million
2. The Dark Knight – $16. 8 million
3. Star Wars: The Clone Wars – $15.5 million
4. Mirrors – $11.1 million
5. Pineapple Express – $10 million
Unfortunately, I was too busy hacking up sperm balls this weekend, so I didn’t get out to see any of this shit. Everyone keeps telling me that Tommy Girl brings the laughs in Tropic Thunder. Even if I tried, I could never laugh WITH Tommy Girl. It’s just not possible. The minute I laugh with him is the moment the aliens have won!