This Is Not Jennifer Aniston’s New Piece

August 15, 2008 / Posted by:

After Jennifer Aniston split up with John Mayer, it was rumored that she quickly picked up a new guy named Matt Felker. He’s a model-type who used to date Selma Blair. Matt’s spokesbitch told Access Hollywood that the rumor is “totally not true.” Like….totally! His rep said that Matt met Jenny over a week ago, but nothing happened. She just threw herself at him and begged him to give her a baby. “Give me a baaaaaaby,” she screamed.

Seriously, I was hoping Jenny was getting some good rebound dick. Oh well! There’s always eharmony.com….and match.com….and jdate.com….and craigslist.org….and ineedamanrightnoworelseimgoingtoloseit.com.

And it’s funny that bitches think Matt looks like Brad Pitt. I mean, he sort of looks like the female-to-male tranny version of Brad Pitt.

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