And They Said It Wouldn’t Last

August 13, 2008 / Posted by:

Well, they were right. That’s if you believe the Daily Mirror. Some ho told them that John Mayer has du-du-dumped Jennifer Aniston because he’s not ready to give up his man whore ways. The two apparently tried to make it work by going on a little relationship hiatus. That didn’t work, so they called it a day.

The source said, “John took the decision to end things as he felt he just wasn’t ready for the level of commitment that Jennifer deserved. Contrary to reports, Jen didn’t want to have kids or marry this year, but she did want to set a timetable for their future together. Initially Jennifer was furious when he told her of his decision but now she’s simply sad – not to mention a little heartbroken.” Not to mention that he should probably keep his car in the garage for a while. And all his pet bunny rabbits indoors. You know, just in case.

Oh well, it’s back to the old maid drawing board for Jenny! The NYDN reports that she’s not spending her days cutting out John’s face from pictures while screaming the lyrics to “Your Body is a Wonderland.” She’s apparently already dating someone else. You know, Jenny needs to take a breather and get to know herself. Don’t go the Kate Hudson route of flapping her vagina all over town.

Jenny has been to Mayer and Vince Vaughn and anywhere she could run……she’s beeeeeen to PITTadise, but she’s never been to her. Oh God. I’m sorry for that. That song has been stuck in my head for the past 5 days ever since I watched Priscilla again on TV. I just had to let it out!

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