Candy Spelling To Tell All

August 8, 2008 / Posted by:

In Tori the Hutt’s first book, she talks a lot of shit about her mommy, Candy. YES, I read Tori the Hutt’s book. I’m sorry, it was wrong of me, but I was taught that you have to keep your enemies close! Besides, it just confirmed my hate for her. HATE!

Anypiggyface, Candy will hopefully get back at Tori in her own tell-all. Candy told ET, “It’s true. I am close to signing a deal to write a book. But everyone should hold on. I have lots of stories I’ve never told, and they will all be in my book! OINK OINK!” Okay, I added that OINK OINK at the end. It just seemed right.

Candy better devote at least 10 chapters to Tori the Hutt. On second thought, she should devote the entire book to her! Who cares about the stupid gift-wrapping room! I want to know all of Tori’s deepest and darkest secrets. You know that bitch has Chronic Queef Syndrome. These are the kinds of things I neeeed to know!

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