Say Coke!

August 3, 2008 / Posted by:

While you were slaving away in your cubicle on Friday, Kate Moss was sunning her cokey face on the Balearic Island of Formentera. Kate, her daughter, her mommy (the ho in the red), Marc Jacobs, Marc’s maybe husband and some other hos spent the afternoon doing lazy, rich people stuff.

Kate’s little trip to Spain could be bad news for Dreamboat Doherty. Kate has reportedly been looking at churches in Ibizia for her wedding to Count von Count aka Jamie Hince. Gross. I hope the church burns down. Shit. Did I just type that?

A source told the Daily Star that Ibiza is special to Kate, because it’s the only place she can do coke in peace! No, she loves it because whores over there have no idea who the hell she is. The source said, “Kate’s barely recognized over there, the weather and surroundings are perfect and it’s the best place to party. It’s got everything she needs.

Kate can’t marry Count von Count! That’s not the way it’s supposed to be! She’s supposed to marry Dreamy. I’m about to charter a floating tire to Ibiza to stop this wedding! Ugh.

Here’s more of Kate and company looking beat at the beach. Dudes should have to get a license in order to wear speedos in public. Seriously, you should have to go through some kind of test. That shit is not for everyone.

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