Above is Peter Cook’s totally homo GQ cover from 1981. Oh how I was miss the 80s when they kept things all-natural and didn’t stuff a dude’s speedo with plantains just because his peen is the size of a snap pea. Peter needs to stop spending $3,000 a month on porn and use that money to buy a penis pump.
Cook Cock and Christie Brinkley have reached a settlement in their divorce trial. The New York Post reports that after three nights of negotiations and several days of court room battles, a settlement was reached this morning.
It’s no surprise that Christie will keep full custody of their two kids and Tiny Cock will get visitation rights. Tiny Cock better password protect his computer before the kiddies come to visit. The last thing he wants his kids to tell Christie after a visit is, “Mommy, we saw this funny movie on dad’s computer. It was these two girls eating peanut butter ice cream together. Can we go get peanut butter ice cream now?”
Christie will also keep their Hamptons home and some other shit. Tiny Cock may also receive a cash settlement from Christie. YAY! More porn money! The settlement will be finalized in court this morning.
Oh well, no more juicy shit. At least we can look forward to the numerous tell-alls, Lifetime movies and reality shows that will obviously follow.